Posts Tagged ‘humor’
February 20th, 2008 | 
Author: I want to thank Kevin Murphy for mentioning me and my efforts at pointing out who Kevin Murphy looks like.
All I actually did was use the MyHeritage Celebrity Face Recognition software and post a link to the image.
No link from Kevin in the blog post. That would have been nice, but you can’t always get what you want, I suppose. After I slaved over a hot web-browser for literally minutes!
Tags: 
Sorry for the lack of updates recently. I’ve been busy. Enjoy this video.
Here are some brief items of interest that I have accrued as a Facebook user.
There is a Facebook application called “My Questions” which allows you to…ask questions. Your friend can then…answer the questions. I hope you don’t need more explanation than that.
Anyway, I posted a question, “Explain this picture in 25 words or less” with the following picture:
My brother, ever the clever one, posted the following explanation. By jingo, I think he got it!
Shortly after that, I was challenged to a quiz about Ashley Tisdale by my sister. Who’s Ashley Tisdale? Beats me, but I accepted the challenge. The writer of this quiz is either a non-native English speaker, brain damaged, or possibly both. Here’s the last question on the quiz, for instance:
So, here’s what I now know about Ashley Tisdale:
- She likes to do shopping
- She does not likes to go to the beach
- She does not likes to singin’ in the house
- She does not likes to ride the car (who does, really?)
- She has no friends (or she doesn’t likes them)
Why she is quiz-worthy remains a mystery to me.
Speedlinking is yet another tool of the lazy blogger. Basically I smash together a bunch of interesting links that I collect every so often, and write a sentence or two about them.
- Having a baby soon? I know I am. Here are some helpful tips about raising a child.
- Dragon Quest Swords looks like my next must-have Wii game. In other news, the video is totally corny, but does a good job of showing off the game and gameplay.
- World of Goo is an interesting looking title for the Wii. It reminds me of goofy but addicting flash games.
Finally, actual technology has caught up with movie technology.
You can now run a dramatic, visual traceroute courtesy of a Google Maps mashup at YouGetSignal.com.
Now all we need is a tool to enhance low-res surveillance cam footage to high-res 10 megapixel images (with a frantic keypressing interface) like so:
Detective: Let’s look at the security cam footage.
Police computer guy: Okay. Instead of using a mouse to pull it up, I will type entirely too much.
Detective: I think that’s him right there. Can we zoom in?
Police computer guy: Okay, let’s zoom in on his face using more typing. Apparently, I know a lot of keyboard shortcuts.
Police computer guy: Here’s a close-up of his face.
Detective: Hmm. Can you enhance that image?
Police computer guy: What a great suggestion. How stupid of me not to realize that this blocky, zoomed image is worthless. Let me type a little bit more to enhance that picture. Here you go:
Detective: Can I get a “hard copy”, which is computer guy lingo for “print out”?
TV producer: This show sure is hip and high-tech!
“One of the many major problems with governing people is that of whom you get to do it; or rather of who manages to get people to let them do it to them.”
“To summarize: it is a well-known fact that those people who most want to rule people are, ipso facto, those least suited to do it.”
“To summarize the summary: anyone capable of getting themselves made President should by no means be allowed to do the job.”
“To summarize the summary of the summary: people are a problem.”
Today, Fred Thompson has quit the presidential race. Maybe someone will pick him up as a VP candidate as a token gesture to the real conservatives. Or maybe Obama will pick him us a VP candidate to truly express his “post-partisan” politics.
*Sigh*
I love having a camera on my cell phone.
Here are two pictures that otherwise would not be exposed to the world.
The first one is funny, if only because it’s so puzzling.
Speedway has this new extra-caffeine coffee (Shockwave), right? Explain this sign to me, especially the last line. Cope? What the crap does that mean? And what kind of price is 2 for $869? Think I’m being picky? Okay, buster, where the heck do you think the decimal point should go? $8.69 for coffee?
Here’s one just taken today:
Clearly the picture tube has problems. Hilarious problems. I took this at a restaurant on my lunch break…while I was consuming mass quantities.
What do you need, and when do you need it?
One man’s need is another man’s want, and one man’s ‘when’ is another man’s ‘whenever.’ So whatever you need, you need it when you need it, but whatever you want, you may not want until you need it. Whatever you don’t not want, you probably want to not want to not need it, when the time comes that need it.
Okay, now that that’s clear, let’s proceed.
Here are some sites that claim to offer what you need, when you need it.
If you still don’t have what you need, then you probably don’t need it.
Some companies actually claim “What you need, when you need it” as their motto. Personally, I don’t think they are being vague enough.
Why Should I Rent From Diamond Rental? “…our corporate motto is “what you need, when you need it.”.
PTB Sales has “What you need, when you need it!”
At Kimball, their full-service promise to our clients is: “What you need, when you need it, within your budget. We do it every day.”
Williams Babbit & Weisman say that “Our absolute goal is… what you need, when you need it and how you need it!”
And finally, even God is what you need, when you need it.
These sort of sites tend to frustrate people like Sugarme1.
Brodie
Listen, not a year goes by, not a year, that I don’t hear about some escalator accident involving some bastard kid which could have easily been avoided had some parent – I don’t care which one – but some parent conditioned him to fear and respect that escalator.
Personally, I think Chipmunk movies are a much worse threat to the children than escalators…
This is becoming something of a tradition here at mgroves.com, I guess.
The Star Wars Holiday Special. Yes the same one I wrote about here and here.
Lucas is so ashamed of this train-wreck of a TV special that he always gets the videos taken down!
So here it is again, the Star Wars Holiday Special. This is the abrdiged, 5 minute version without all the Wookie noise (also without the cartoon).