2011 Funniest Commercial Awards
For some reason, a lot of commercials really appealed to me this year. Maybe it’s because I so rarely watch commercials anymore (DVR,Netflix) that a good commercial really stands out to me. Anyway, this is mainly an excuse to get a cheap blog post with some funny videos. So, without further ado…
5. My brand!
1-800-CONTACTS overly dramatic unboxing commercial. This commercial might not have come out in 2011. That’s okay, it’s not like this award has the same rigor as, say, the Nickelodean Kids’ Choice Awards.
4. I like tacos…
I really like the acting in this commercial, and especially the delivery of “I like tacos” to a crowd of bewildered, chewing coworkers.
3. That’s dumb
This is the commercial that keeps on giving. It’s like the Arrested Development of commercials: each time you watch, you’ll find some new hilarious aspect of it.
2. CUZ I’M BLACK OPS
It’s bizarre how good of a comedic delivery that Brian Wilson has.
1. Yeah dog!
I don’t think I need to explain this one too much.
My new android app
Well, it’s not exactly what I expected to create, but one of my goals this year was to get at least two Android apps into the market(s): one free and one paid. Those goals are now accomplished.
My free app has been in the market(s) for a while, and has actually gotten a recent update: Mono Stock Portfolio, which is totally free (and no ads), and was really just a way for me to help learn (and teach) the Mono for Android tool. According to Google, this app actually has a surprisingly large user base: 1080 total installs, and 393 active installs. And I’ve gotten several e-mails from users asking for more features!
The other app, I just threw together this weekend in a sudden fit of whimsy, inspired in no small part by this commercial:
The app is “Yeah Dog!“, which I started creating with Mono for Android, but soon realized that the 5mb+ overhead just didn’t make sense for this app. So I rewrote it, painstakingly, in Java, which wasn’t as unpleasant as I thought it might’ve been (but unpleasant nonetheless). This app will set you back 99 American cents, and is also ad-free.
In the process of creating and publishing Yeah Dog!, I came to find out that I was beaten to market! First, GEICO actually released their own “BroStache” app some time ago, but I discovered that there is a secret “Yeah Dawg” feature in that app. Secondly, some other rascal created his own YeahDawg app (albeit an inferior one!) and published a mere two days before me.
Oh well. Such is the harsh reality of free markets. But in any case, I believe I have enriched myself as a developer, speaker, and businessman throughout the process of creating, publishing, and maintaining these apps, so that alone makes it worth it.
How to pronounce things
One of the interesting phenomena arising from the web and its widespread use by programmers is a disconnect between technical words/jargon and how to pronounce them. If you read a word instead of hearing it from someone, you still make up an arbitrary pronunciation. This can make for awkward moments when the word finally does come up between programmers in person (which does happen, honest!).
Here are some examples. Read them aloud:
- Tuple
- C#
- SQL
- CAPTCHA
- WSDL
- GUID
- .GIF
- pwned
- char
- varchar
I’ve heard all of the above terms pronounced at least two different ways. GIF even has a long history of controversy about its pronunciation. I think I’ve heard ‘varchar’ pronounced about 6 different ways (vair/var + care/car/char).
So, what to do? Even if you are sure that “Tuple” is pronounced “toople” instead of “tupple”, it seems petty and annoying to call someone incorrect. If the intent is understood, then I guess it comes down to a matter of prescriptive vs descriptive linguistics. If you lean towards descriptive linguistics, then it really doesn’t matter if you pronounce CAPTCHA as “cuh-pahtch-uh”, as long as your audience knows what you’re talking about. If you are in the prescriptive camp, then C# must be ‘see-sharp’, and ‘see-pound’ is unacceptable.
Personally, I would lean towards descriptive, so long as there is no possibility of ambiguity. However, I totally sympathize for the prescriptive’s point of view, since in many cases, the pronunciation is not emergent, but defined (as in GIF’s case).
So, what are some other terms (computer-related or otherwise), that have put you into a similar awkward situation?
Brought to you by the Anti-Onion Council
I hate onions: the smell, the texture, the flavor. I find the very idea of them being consumed as food offensive. I find everything about them offensive.
For instance, did you know that the chemical responsible for the wretched odor that onions give off is the same chemical as found in the defensive spray that skunks secrete?
That’s right: Thiol. It’s in skunk spray and it’s in onions.
Just think about that next time you bite into an onion. This message brought to you by the Anti-Onion Council.
What condiments am I allowed to steal?
Occasionally, when I am at Chipotle and I get a burrito ‘to go’, I will stuff a bottle of the Chipotle Tabasco sauce in my bag and abscond with it.
My esteemed colleague, Joe, has indicated to me that this is theft, and that I am a thief. And furthermore, he intends to “drop a dime” upon my backside and inform the authorities.
I retort that my action is akin to taking a bunch of ketchup packets, horsey sauce, etc from the condiment stand, and thus, is not theft!
So which is it? Submit your treatise of the subject below.
Catherine Vogt
Cathering Vogt noticed that Obama was very popular among her 8th-grade colleagues.
So, she tried an experiment. She wore a homemade t-shirt with “McCain Girl” written on it to school one day just to see how tolerant Obama’s supporters were.
Here are some responses:
- Classmate(s) suggested that she be be “burned with her shirt on” for “being a filthy-rich Republican.”
- One person told her to “go die”.
- Some people were “calling me very stupid”
- And finally, one person said that “she will not judge me for my choice, but that she was surprised that I supported McCain”. Her teacher.
She wore an “Obama Girl” shirt the next day and got less flak.
Not all that suprising: these are 8th graders who are bombarded with The Daily Show and Green Day and the agenda of the NEA and what not every day.
But the most bothersome quote to me was that she was a “filthy-rich Republican”. There is clearly a populist perception that Republicans are all greedy and rich, and got that way by “exploiting the common working family” or some such tired rhetoric. This is a very dangerous thing, because it leads to very stupid laws that are meant to “reduce economic inequality”. And they will reduce economic inequality: they will make us equally miserable.
The way to improve economic conditions is not to make conditions worse for the rich–it’s to improve conditions for everyone. It’s not by envy and soaking-the-rich, but by reduction in government interference: subsidies, price controls, taxes, bureaucracy, tariffs, bailouts, entitlements, protectivist trade, and monopolies (government and private). Let’s be very skeptical about central planning and err in the favor of markets.
Travolta pumpkin
There was a pumpkin carving competition at work recently.
Our group decided to (as usual) not make any sense and carve a pumpkin with John Travolta’s face.
I can’t really take any credit: the artistic work is entirely Jonny’s. So, I’ll just leave these pictures here…
So haunting…
None pizza with left beef
Speaking as someone who worked in the pizza business for a good amount of time, I found this guy messing with Domino’s online ordering system (which, I should add, is not available to my area–let’s get on the ball, Domino’s!) to be extra-hilarious.
Especially the personal-size pizza that he ordered with “none” sauce, “none” cheese, and Beef on the “left” half of the pizza.
It’s a perfectly valid order. It’s also perfectly insane. Domino’s followed the instructions as best they could. Here’s the monstrous result:
I’m sure the beef was carefully placed on one half of this atrocity before it arrived, but at some point in transit, the beef went AWOL, due to the lack of cheese and sauce that usually acts as a bonding agent.
My greatest wish in life is to somehow travel back in time to that Domino’s kitchen when this order arrived. It’s just too bad there’s no “none” option for crust.
How is babby formed?
how is babby formed
how girl get pragnent
they need to do way instain mother> who kill thier babbys. becuse these babby cant frigth back? it was on the news this mroing a mother in ar who had kill her three kids . they are taking the three babby back to new york too lady to rest my pary are with the father who lost his chrilden ; i am truley sorry for your lots
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