It’s the new year, time for fresh starts, resolutions, and..uh..drinking.

So in the spirit of all 3, welcome to the (4th?) new look of mgroves.com. This time, I’m using a whole new blogging engine. Instead of my custom engine that I wrote years and years ago, I’m using Habari, which is an open source PHP blogging engine. The Habari guys came to Columbus to demo and promote Habari at the PHP Meetup. I liked it and thought I would give it a go.

Additionally, you’ll notice a new design. This design was not created by the always talented Jon Plante, but instead it is a Habari theme, with a few minor adjustments. I’ve never been a fan of using themes–I’m afraid someone else will use the same theme and then it’ll be like we wore the same dress to a party, and we all know how embarrassing that is. But I’ll give it a go, and if it doesn’t work out, I can always cajole Jon for some more free labor.

So anyway, leave a comment, let me know what you think, and let me know of any kinks that I need to iron out.

Another excuse for my lack of activity: I’ve been moving the site over to new hosting. There was nothing wrong with the old hosting, I’m just consolidating sites (I’m getting quite a network of sites going here).

So, if you see anything wrong, point it out to me, and I’ll get it fixed as soon as possible.

As for the lack of content: I’ve got a couple of good ideas brewing. The creativity drought might be at an end. My apathy for this election season isn’t helping, but I know the reader of mgroves.com demands results, not excuses. I shall double my efforts.

Thank you for the okay questions. I will try to answer a few of them, but please don’t hold me responsible for inaccuracies, misunderstandings, or outright lies.

With that disclaimer in place, here are some answers.

Sithlet asks, What kind of screwed up keyboard do you have that puts the question mark in place of the e?

This is how keyboards are made in Colorado, buddy, better get used to it!

Always the rebel, Nathan asks, If the creator of My Little Pony asked you where his 18 year old son should go to college, while at the same time asking you where the best place to breed cattle in space, by asking you if his rocket would be able to carry the mammal, what would you advise?

Answer: Don’t move to Houston without one of those air conditioned hats.

David asks, I just found out the other day that Himmelreich, the name mine was anglicized from, is a common surname for Ashkenazi Jews. Everyone told me grandpa was Catholic… Is this some sort of a Steve Martin “The Jerk” scenario? And is it okay to stop feeling ethnic shame for the holocaust and start feeling ethnic outrage? When does that kick in?

I would suggest trying to dispel both feelings of shame and of outrage. The world has enough of both already. I do suggest, however, that you do not name your son David, because it could eventually lead to David Himmelreich the 3rd, or “Third Reich” for short.

And now the serious portion of “Ask Matt”. Jonny gives me yet another opportunity to demonstrate “begging the question“. Of course, every day, Jonny torments me by using the phrase “begging the question” incorrectly. 2000 years ago, the world’s population center was still in China (approx. 50 million people). Is Jesus a bad guy for not giving them and generations of their children a chance for salvation rather than burning away in hell.

Jonny’s question makes an assumption that 50 million+ (at least) Chinese are going to hell because Jesus initially lived and taught in the middle east. I’m not convinced that is a safe assumption to make (hence I think Jonny is begging the question). The same question can be asked about people who lived before Jesus (especially Gentiles), and even the small amount of people today who haven’t heard of Jesus. Jonny isn’t the first to ask this question, and there are many schools of thought on this in theology and apologetics. Ultimately it doesn’t matter what my answer or any other man’s answer is. Romans 12:19 says “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.” Some Christians think every person ever is saved no matter what they’ve done or haven’t done, some Christians think only 144,000 people are going to heaven. Me? I think it’s possible that Dahmer, Hitler, and Saddam have all been saved and are in heaven right now, but it’s not my call. I’m thankful Jesus came, and I think I could do a lot worse job of finding someone to worship and try to emulate. If you think that’s a cop-out, so be it. That’s my answer in the context of Christianity. If you aren’t a Christian, the question is moot (or at least akin to a Kirk/Picard debate), because you probably don’t believe that Jesus saved anyone from anything.

But know this: the sin of misuse of the phrase “begging the question” is unforgiveable, and for that, you will burn in the lake of fire.

And finally, UR lays on the toughest question of all, If a trombone is made of brass and a clarinet is made of wood…then what is a yoyo made of?

Hobo bones.

Do you guys enjoy this “Ask Matt” stuff?